The Agent Trap
by Jaden
Agents and lawyers have a bad rap for being megalomaniacs.
Just like in any group, the few extremists give the rest a bad name.
I have heard stories about agents who curse, yell, and throw things at their assistants. As fun as that sounds, when it is unwelcome, it can break down a person’s good spirit.
Agencies are like fraternities; they do some heavy hazing before they let agent-hopefuls climb the ranks.
Although agents get away with a lot of bad behavior, there are lots of people like me who take note and would never give the brash ones my business.
One time, I was working in the entertainment legal department of a television network. Some young flunky lawyer who thought he was a hotshot agent was trying to play hardball with the old school attorney for whom I worked.
On behalf of the network, we were negotiating with the representatives of the actor for our television show pilot. Because the agreement is a seriously detailed seven-year binding contract between the actor and the network, often sensitive negotiations go right up until the audition time.
The actor is not allowed to audition if the agreement is not signed.
After weeks of negotiation, this nobody agent was still arguing over some silly detail for his nobody teenage actress, something like whether there would be one or two doors on her trailer. Whatever it was, it was a detail that the company didn’t allow to be changed even for big name actors. As the agent was busy making unrealistic demands over the phone, the strict audition time passed for the poor little girl who was sitting out in the lobby.
As this was a one-shot deal, another actress was chosen and the TV show went on to great success. Many years have passed since then. This sweet and talented actress, who was the number one choice for the show, never landed any other major roles because she had a cocky no-good agent.
After everyone had gone home, this guy calls me back and asks for the Vice President. I say, “She’s left for the day. The auditions are over. Your client missed it.”
The agent says to me, “You’re lying. Put your boss on the phone.”
Talk about dumb arrogance! What could I do? There was no boss to put on the phone. We weren’t playing games with him, like he was with us. Our group was a straight shootin’ bunch. We honestly did what we reasonably could for this actress.
When the rest of the legal team came back the next day, we all had a good laugh about this agent’s illusions of grandeur. Other lawyers had a few stories to share about him too. And I can tell you, I told all my friends in the industry to avoid dealing with this guy.
The day was done! The cast had already been selected for our TV show, and here’s this guy calling me a liar, and still trying to make demands. He had no idea how to do his job or what was the process.
A bad agent can ruin a person’s entire career. Sometimes, a golden opportunity comes once in a lifetime.
As a writer or actor, your name can be tarnished by those who represent you. You must choose wisely. Never be desperate about selecting your representation. Be confident that you are valuable and that you want to work with someone who is worthy of you. Keep in mind that any money you make from your hard work, your agent gets 10-20% of it. Don’t pick a jerk who doesn’t deserve it!
In this case, it was the perfect role for this girl and the director wanted her specifically. If your rep blows it for you — that’s it! Game over. We, at the network, all felt terrible for this young actress, but there was nothing we could do for her.
Being a dolt does not serve the agent or the client or anyone else involved. Rude behavior never wins.
You can play hardball with good manners. “No, I am sorry we cannot accept that offer. We want two doors and ten mirrors in the trailer. If you change your mind, call me. It has been a real pleasure negotiating with you.”
Before saying something like that, and before flushing a client’s career down the toilet for some extra doors and mirrors, agents and lawyers ought to do their homework. Find out whether your demands are realistic or not. Ask your co-workers at your agency.
In this agent’s case, plenty of his co-workers had done similar deals with our network. Asking a few people, he would have found out that even higher paid, more notable, actors had not received that for which he was demanding.
Not only did the young actress miss a huge opportunity, but also the agent/lawyer (he was some kind of crossbreed) lost out on his 15% of her money for the next seven years!
There are lots of other negative ways a client is seriously affected by their agent’s rude behavior, but legally, I can’t share that information. Just know that it is better for all parties to play it safe and be nice!
Choose representation that will reflect positively on you, someone who has your best interests in mind, not someone who is blowing air into his inflatable ego. When you are making money, the agent is making money. Sometimes, it seems like agents forget that.
ADVICE TO AGENTS AND LAWYERS:
Treat every person with respect.
Never make absurd accusations or demands.
Do your homework.
Say “please” and “thank you.”
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[...] I mention in The Agent Trap, making unrealistic demands is a sure way to kill a deal and possibly your entire career. Demands [...]