Coffee: A Writer’s Best Friend
by Jaden
Woe was me when I stopped drinking coffee for a few years in my grand effort to be über-healthy. To heck with that!
Is coffee bad for you?
Coffee can cause mad-babbling, hyperactivity, anxiety, and suppress your appetite, from my personal studies.
The semi-official studies say (probably spearheaded by Starbuck’s): Coffee is supposed to be good for the liver; a nice counter-attack for that over-consumption of whiskey. Seems far-fetched to me, but they say several cups of coffee per day throughout a person’s life can reduce Alzheimer’s disease up to 60%; one cup a day shows no difference. Coffee possibly reduces the problems of Diabetes 2. A few cups a day supposedly keeps old people spry. I’ve heard that active brains are healthy, so maybe it has something to do with that.
The coffee warnings: People with blood pressure problems beware of coffee as the caffeine affects the heart. Pregnant woman might want to lay off of it. There is a very long unconfirmed list of illnesses that might be aggravated or triggered by coffee, but also might be from smoking or lack of veggies and exercise. Finally, coffee is a mild diuretic; to counter the need to run and make a poopy on a hot morning date, drink a glass of water.
Whatever you are drinking, eating or doing, you need to consider how it affects YOU; that’s the bottom line.
Espresso coffee derives from 1,500 chemical substances. Yikes! Research on bean growing, roasting, grinding, and packaging for the best flavor is a very expensive and intricate process, so when an entity gets it right, let’s clap our hands.
For strong rich coffee flavor, Italian brands rule the north western hemisphere. 
What is generally accepted as the best and most accessible coffee of Europe is Illy
The United States brands I prefer are Peet’s
In Hollywood, my favorite roaster is Urth Caffé on Melrose Avenue, a place full of scenesters and drop-dead gorgeous women. It is always annoyingly packed and therefore terrible for writing, though I still try. Eons ago, when it was less popular, I met some successful screenwriters there. The eggs are gawd-awful, but the coffee is the best in the city. Their specialty drinks are nips of heaven; I’m addicted to the Granita.
My favorite place in the world to drink coffee (usually they serve Illy) is in Paris. Any charming café will do. I just sit there for hours watching people and writing.
Trying every type of cheap coffee brewer from the regular ol’ pot, to a double espresso camping thingamajig, to a glass coffee press, my favorite is a recent purchase from Italy for $15, it is a stainless steal Class Bialetti
and screw on the top, you place it on the stove burner. This makes a kickin’ cup o’ joe.
When I received a fine gift of coffee beans from Seattle, I had to break down and buy a coffee grinder too. For freshness, taste, and strength, you can’t beat freshly ground coffee. After looking at about 30 products, I chose the Mr. Coffee Grinder with Chamber Maid
If coffee is your favorite flavor too, let me give you a breath-saving tip. Rinse your mouth with hydrogen peroxide one-to-one with water. Much cheaper and more efficient than mouthwash, it is only 99 cents a bottle, it whitens your teeth, kills bacteria, and freshens your breath. Brush your teeth and floss too. Take care of your filthy stinking coffee breath, you writer.
Please share your favorite coffee brands, tricks, and experience with us.
Sunday Picture Post 2 / Tip: Vision
For The Sunday Picture Post, we are going to flip upside-down the saying: “A picture is worth a thousand words.” Thousands of words are great if you are writing a novel, but if you are writing a screenplay, you need to do the opposite and be as concise as possible.
Each Sunday I will post a picture. For your screenwriting practice in brevity, in the comments section, please post one or all of the following:
- 1 word describing the theme, mood, or scene
- 1 sentence to describe the scene
- A pitch to sell the entire movie
The more colorful and creative you are, the better! Use any genre.
A good screenwriter is laconic, using a few words to say a lot.
SCREENWRITING TIP OF THE DAY: VISION
To be a great filmmaker, director, cinematographer, or screenwriter, you have to be a visionary with powerful images in mind. Before you can film or write, you need to imagine the scene vividly.
As a writer, you must consider: Is it day or night? Lots of people around or no one? Warm and friendly or scary and lonely? Is it 1833 or 2033? Are there important atmospheric sounds? Vintage costumes? Spaceships or horses? Farm or city? Inside or outside?
As the filmmaker, you must think about: What angle catches the mood best? What lighting will make my actors look glamorous or scary? How can I frame this scene for the most emotional impact? Close up? Far away? One character blurry, with one in focus? Who is the most important character in this scene? How does she feel? What colors will capture the mood?
NOTE TO SCREENWRITERS: You do NOT put camera directions in your screenplay. (Exception: You are the director too.)
Lots of movies have clever script ideas, but terrible cinematography and direction. While other scripts come across simple and boring to read, they can make beautiful films. This is why it is sometimes best for an exceptionally talented visionary to write and film his/her own work, to make sure the vision is properly fulfilled.
Seeing is believing.
Have a great Saint Patrick’s Day Monday!
Go pinch some non-green-wearing booty.
News Today is a Crock of Crap:
Searching for the Depp-Dali Screenplay Competition
by Jaden
Kindly, a friend tipped me off to this exciting news bit on the wire about Johnny Depp looking for a screenplay about Salvador Dali.
Floating on countless news websites is this:
A source said: “He’s open to working with anyone – from housewives to pensioners – if the script is right.”
A lover of Dali, Depp, Paris, and screenwriting, I looked further into it, but could not find a single word legitimizing the statement.
WHO is the “source?”
The best I could trace the statement back to is Bangshowbiz out of London — London, gossip capital of the world! Who at Bang wrote this? Who was their source?
Talk about rumors! Here we have this mystery source — probably some Parisian waitress — who overheard Depp talking casually at dinner to his gorgeous wife how he’d like to play Dali if only he could find the right script.
Is it news when one person tells one person who tells another person who tells another person something the first person overhead when she was eavesdropping on what one person was saying to another person in a private conversation?
Or is this just another piece of sensational gossip?
Today’s news is hearsay. For something to be news today, one person just has to print it and call it news. Then everyone else picks it up and reprints it.
Does anyone do investigative reporting anymore? Everyone just accepts whatever they are told. Reprint. Reprint. Reprint. All I could find was the exact same article on tons of different websites.
The Internet permits news to become a receptacle for sewage.
Gone are the days when reporters moved from their chairs! Now we just get lazy reporting from people sitting at their computer digging up dung off the Internet and reprinting it.
Where are the official entry address and guidelines for this script Depp supposedly wants? Who is going to read all these scripts flooding in from around the world? Does his representation back this statement? Anyone ask Depp or his reps about this? I’d like to hear what they have to say.
Around the world, people are now writing scripts for Depp about Dali, without ever considering the source of this news piece, or I should say, the lack of source.
According to Bangshowbiz:
Al Pacino and Peter O’Toole are being lined up to star in rival movies, Dali and I and Goodbye Dali respectively.
Depp would be perfect to play Dali, but if two movies are already in the works about Dali, is Depp really going to make the massive financial commitment to a third?
I wanted to tell my readers about how to submit for this awesome screenwriting opportunity, but it doesn’t exist! From what I can see, it is just another trashy traffic-attracting hoax.
If anyone can validate the source and Depp’s desire for this Dali script, please do! We would all love to know.
Scariest Horror Films of All Time
by Jaden
What do you do when a stranger calls on Halloween, says her name is Carrie, she’s from Texas, she auditioned for your film last summer, and she’s been dreaming about you ever since?
Hang up!
1999, Ôdishon (aka Audition)
Audition was one movie I did not have to see. This Japanese film was unforgettably unsettling. A nice man loses his wife many years earlier and is encouraged by his son and sleazy friend to start dating again. The sleazy friend sets up a fake film audition where the nice man finds the talented pretty Yamazaki Asami. The young woman, who was abused as a child, tortures the man in ways that are unbearable to watch. Novel by Ryû Murakami, Daisuke Tengan wrote the screenplay.
1979, When a Stranger Calls
As a young child, I saw the original When a Stranger Calls. The majority of the film is not gory, but the suspense and real time of the movie sure make going to sleep difficult. Written by Steve Feke and Fred Walton, the story is: the kids are in bed sleeping while the babysitter receives scary menacing phone calls. This one hit a little too close to home. Forever in my head, I will hear that creepy voice asking, “Have you checked the children?”
1974, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre
When I was a kid, this was rumored to be a true story. Apparently, it is loosely based on the real crimes of Ed Gein, a real life killer who also inspired the movie Psycho. Deviant: The Shocking True Story of Ed Gein, the Original Psycho
1976, Carrie
This is the kind of scary movie all kids should be forced to watch. A high school girl has magick powers and does terrible things to people when they are mean to her. Like a Disney movie, Carrie teaches a good lesson: be nice to your classmates. Novel written by Stephen King, screenplay was adapted for screen by Lawrence D. Cohen.
1984, A Nightmare on Elm Street
For horror film ideas, Wes Craven’s A Nightmare on Elm Street is genius. Freddy Krueger is a phenomenon who comes to kill you in your nightmares. My childhood friends and I pondered endlessly: Would you die in real life if you died in your dream? It was the big question. We all have had dreams about dying, but no one ever hits the ground! When good ol’ Freddy started entering my dreams at night, that was it, the end of my horror film parade.
What horror films traumatized you?
Take a Beating and Like It:
Accepting Criticism Gracefully
by Jaden
In whatever field you are writing, you will encounter negative feedback and constructive criticism — if you are lucky!
Some Internet writers put up a massive defense against negative comments on their posts. This steals the thunder of whatever it was they were saying. If the idea was mostly accurate, faithful readers will come to defend — let them duke it out on your behalf.
If the majority of readers are saying: “Hey buddy, you are way off base;” face it, majority rules: you blew it. Instead of battling to your death like a fool, be big enough to admit when you are wrong. If you can’t learn from your mistakes, you’re doomed to repeat them.
Whether you erred or not, you know you’ve made it big when people lambaste you in public forums. Be happy that you’re doing something right, otherwise no one would care.
When it comes to Hollywood, whether you are a screenwriter, filmmaker or actor, critics are scathing and industry professionals are insensitively aloof. Not polite or tactful as receptors of entertainment or in business dealings, the critics say more than is necessary, and industry professionals don’t tell you enough.
When you submit a script to a friend or stranger in the industry, blessed be the day you get feedback. Hollywood is Ignore City. Phone calls and emails go unanswered. What’s worse is that you don’t know if they ever read your material at all. Your Oscar winning script could have gone straight to the trash without a single eye ever glossing over it. Or maybe they did read it and thought it was so embarrassingly awful they decided to ignore you instead of doing the kind favor of explaining your shortcomings.
The few times a person cares enough to tell you where your writing or story fail (this goes for auditioning and acting too) — wooh-wee is that a horse pill to swallow!
Criticism is a compliment. You should be flattered. It means people care enough about you to say something. They see potential in you and think you can do better. Be thankful that people have taken time out of their day to help you succeed. Feedback is a great thing. Apply it to your life and your work the best you can.
To learn, expand, and grow, you need to be wrong sometimes.
My method of dealing with criticism goes like this:
What do you think of this? No, I like it my way better. I’m right. I’m right. I’m right. Oh. Ok. I see your point. Yeah, you’re right. Sorry, I was being stubborn.
We all do it. We are all right. It’s ok to be wrong sometimes.
(Intelligent debates and jackass comments are welcome at my site.)
Subscribe
-
-
Content RSS